whenever i read a book that captivates my imagination (lord of the rings, the chronicles of narnia, anne of green gables, gone with the wind, harry potter...), it sort of takes over my life. by take over my life i mean that i begin to see my world under the influence of a hobbit, or a british girl that happens upon a magical wardrobe into a world of enchanted lampposts, or a little redheaded orphan with a big imagination etc. etc. i instinctively begin to apply what i am reading to my outside life and i start yearning for strange things. i.e. to go on a dangerous quest through middle earth and eat only hobbit fare as i stumble into adventures with elves and trees and wizards. or to live in prince edward island and be relentlessly wooed and pursued by someone almost too dashingly wonderful called Gilbert Blythe.
so, it is only natural that i had to find some adequate character amongst my literary alter egos to see my current life situation at present. but one wasn’t enough because i am feeling a lot of different things. so i have gone with two of the best. first there is Lucy Pevensie: youngest of the Pevensie children; Queen of Narnia; friend of fauns and all Narnian creatures; beloved of Aslan. all-around BA.
in the past month I have undergone the most difficult, soul-stretching, bewildering, surprising, and blessed experience of my little life. one that feels so foreign from the life i lived before and the life i have been compelled to return to. just call me Lucy. she was taken through a wardrobe into a new world, a new life, a new experience of beauty, uncertainty, suffering and sorrow; and finally, the triumph of life over death. time was different, the world was more beautiful than the one she came from, and she was ready to stay for good. but, Providence, as often He is wont to do, had other plans. her and her siblings were rent from Narnia and stumbled right back into the moment they left behind. just like that.
i imagine we feel similar things about being unceremoniously taken from the place and the people that were such an integral part of the life altering experience.
it is hard. but, i suppose, necessary. can’t get too comfortable in this life. we were not made for comfort after all. we were made for greatness (taken from a quote by some guy that i can't think of). but that does not stop one from longing to return to Narnia. or Texas.
the other character i feel quite akin to at this juncture is, of course, my dear friend Anne of Green Gables. for her love of the beauty of creation, i found a kindred spirit in her; and for her devotion and vision of home, i found the perfect articulation of how i feel about my home:
“ I wonder if it will be--can be--any more beautiful than this,” murmured Anne, looking around her with the loving enraptured eyes of those to whom ‘home’ must always be the loveliest spot in the world, no matter what fairer lands may lie under alien stars” -Anne of the Island
my devotion to texas stems from my devotion to home. if you know me, you know i am not crazy about Austin--or at least what is famous about Austin. i could go home and never once go into Austin proper and be perfectly content. it is winding creek drive that i love.
it is my parents at the dinner table when i come in from a walk down my street that gives joy to my heart.
it is sunsets from my porch rocking chair
it is laying on the driveway to discuss with the Heavens the strangeness, beauty, and sorrows, of life that have my heart clamoring for home.
it is the memory of all the Chaplets i prayed with Mimi in her room or on the porch that forever has endeared these places to me.
so, i am simultaneously homesick and Narnia sick. and of course, by Narnia sick i mean i am not used to being out of the realm between time and eternity. that unearthly place that i sat with my dear Mimi and my parents and those lovely people that came a few times to sit with us for a while. i am still grieving and still dazed and bewildered to be gone from it all.
like little Lucy, I find myself back in busy, crowded, unfamiliar, jolly old England. not sure what to do besides what i can do. live, breathe, pray and trust in the Lord and that He will, as He always has (with or without my understanding--usually without it), take perfect care of me.
His plans are to prosper us and not to harm us-they are to give us a future full of hope (Jeremiah 29:11). a future like that sunset above. so i hope for what i cannot see and pray that i have the patience and grace to wait in the dark for light inaccessible.
and what do you know, the perfect Church season happened upon me this weekend. Welcome, dear Advent. the Season of Hope and expectation of the arrival of He Who is Love, Hope and Beauty to be born in our hearts once again. well, well, well-it’s like it was planned or something.
we can journey to Bethlehem with Our Blessed Mother, harboring heaven in her womb, and her most righteous husband, St. Joseph--weary, worn, and walking through the darkness of this world. all the time, patiently and with total abandonment to the will of the Father, waiting for a glimpse of the little face of He Who dwells in Light Inaccessible. that is the hope we all cherish. and thank God He was willing to leave Heaven so that our hopes can be realized.
so, it is with a heart full of longing and hope that i pray you have a blessed and holy Advent season.
from all of us in jolly England, i bid you a pip pip, and cheerio, old beans.
and don’t worry, England isn’t all bad. the bright side, you may be wondering? guess where Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry is? you can bet your bottom dollar i’ll be waiting to catch the next train off of platform of 9 ¾. and i will be drinking my butter bear out of the biggest thrift store score of all time:
and yes, Hogwarts is no Narnia--trust me, i know. but, guess what? there are unicorns at Hogwarts, too. so maybe i’ll hop a Howgartsian unicorn and fly on over to Narnia for a visit. am i taking this Hogwarts/Narnia thing too far? i’ll answer your question with a quote from the office: I don’t think i’ve taken it far enough.
and with that extra splash of excessive nerdiness, i once more bid you a fond Howartsia fare thee well.
so, it is only natural that i had to find some adequate character amongst my literary alter egos to see my current life situation at present. but one wasn’t enough because i am feeling a lot of different things. so i have gone with two of the best. first there is Lucy Pevensie: youngest of the Pevensie children; Queen of Narnia; friend of fauns and all Narnian creatures; beloved of Aslan. all-around BA.
in the past month I have undergone the most difficult, soul-stretching, bewildering, surprising, and blessed experience of my little life. one that feels so foreign from the life i lived before and the life i have been compelled to return to. just call me Lucy. she was taken through a wardrobe into a new world, a new life, a new experience of beauty, uncertainty, suffering and sorrow; and finally, the triumph of life over death. time was different, the world was more beautiful than the one she came from, and she was ready to stay for good. but, Providence, as often He is wont to do, had other plans. her and her siblings were rent from Narnia and stumbled right back into the moment they left behind. just like that.
 |
| my Narnia |
i imagine we feel similar things about being unceremoniously taken from the place and the people that were such an integral part of the life altering experience.
 |
| i miss momma and dad . a lot . |
it is hard. but, i suppose, necessary. can’t get too comfortable in this life. we were not made for comfort after all. we were made for greatness (taken from a quote by some guy that i can't think of). but that does not stop one from longing to return to Narnia. or Texas.
the other character i feel quite akin to at this juncture is, of course, my dear friend Anne of Green Gables. for her love of the beauty of creation, i found a kindred spirit in her; and for her devotion and vision of home, i found the perfect articulation of how i feel about my home:
“ I wonder if it will be--can be--any more beautiful than this,” murmured Anne, looking around her with the loving enraptured eyes of those to whom ‘home’ must always be the loveliest spot in the world, no matter what fairer lands may lie under alien stars” -Anne of the Island
my devotion to texas stems from my devotion to home. if you know me, you know i am not crazy about Austin--or at least what is famous about Austin. i could go home and never once go into Austin proper and be perfectly content. it is winding creek drive that i love.
it is my parents at the dinner table when i come in from a walk down my street that gives joy to my heart.
it is sunsets from my porch rocking chair
it is laying on the driveway to discuss with the Heavens the strangeness, beauty, and sorrows, of life that have my heart clamoring for home.
it is the memory of all the Chaplets i prayed with Mimi in her room or on the porch that forever has endeared these places to me.
so, i am simultaneously homesick and Narnia sick. and of course, by Narnia sick i mean i am not used to being out of the realm between time and eternity. that unearthly place that i sat with my dear Mimi and my parents and those lovely people that came a few times to sit with us for a while. i am still grieving and still dazed and bewildered to be gone from it all.
like little Lucy, I find myself back in busy, crowded, unfamiliar, jolly old England. not sure what to do besides what i can do. live, breathe, pray and trust in the Lord and that He will, as He always has (with or without my understanding--usually without it), take perfect care of me.
 |
| my last Texas sunset for this visit (taken at the airport) |
and what do you know, the perfect Church season happened upon me this weekend. Welcome, dear Advent. the Season of Hope and expectation of the arrival of He Who is Love, Hope and Beauty to be born in our hearts once again. well, well, well-it’s like it was planned or something.
we can journey to Bethlehem with Our Blessed Mother, harboring heaven in her womb, and her most righteous husband, St. Joseph--weary, worn, and walking through the darkness of this world. all the time, patiently and with total abandonment to the will of the Father, waiting for a glimpse of the little face of He Who dwells in Light Inaccessible. that is the hope we all cherish. and thank God He was willing to leave Heaven so that our hopes can be realized.
so, it is with a heart full of longing and hope that i pray you have a blessed and holy Advent season.
from all of us in jolly England, i bid you a pip pip, and cheerio, old beans.
and don’t worry, England isn’t all bad. the bright side, you may be wondering? guess where Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry is? you can bet your bottom dollar i’ll be waiting to catch the next train off of platform of 9 ¾. and i will be drinking my butter bear out of the biggest thrift store score of all time:
and yes, Hogwarts is no Narnia--trust me, i know. but, guess what? there are unicorns at Hogwarts, too. so maybe i’ll hop a Howgartsian unicorn and fly on over to Narnia for a visit. am i taking this Hogwarts/Narnia thing too far? i’ll answer your question with a quote from the office: I don’t think i’ve taken it far enough.
and with that extra splash of excessive nerdiness, i once more bid you a fond Howartsia fare thee well.
 |
| o come , o come , Emmanuel |
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